Fandom Clinic, Friday

[doesdoctorstuff]

"...What kind of trial?" Navaan asked Stabastian. "Trial by fuck? I'm great at that, I'll be acquitted for sure!"

Stabastian waved his claws in what was probably negation and, roughly twenty minutes later, one of the nurses had been convinced to put on several episodes of Rules and Regulations, which had all of them - vampires, nurses, and crab - entranced.

"Wait, that kind of trial?" Navaan objected. "That's boring!"

"Hush!" one of the nurses said. "It's just getting good!"

The clinic was open and the TV was on.

Chung-chung!

Comments

The Front Desk

[doesdoctorstuff]

You'd better be really convincing if you wanted their attention.

Or hot. Navaan might be amenable if you were hot enough.

Re: The Front Desk

[single_man_tear]

Hopefully Dean looked hot enough. After dealing with a layover at Portalocity he finally made it back to Fandom in the morning. Most of his injuries were superficial but the scratch on his side needed more attention.

He was currently holding it tight with some gauze from his med kit. "Yeah, uh I need a few stitches?"

Re: The Front Desk

[doesdoctorstuff]

"Shhhh," one of the nurses hissed.

Navaan, however, recognized the voice. "Oh hey!" she said, followed by another round of hushing. "You need stitches? What for? The tailor shop is...I dunno. Somewhere on the island."

Re: The Front Desk

[single_man_tear]

"Uh, I'm cut and bleeding?" Dean replied. "It's not life ending but I'd rather get it cleaned up and-"

He stopped.

"Is this the one where Danielle Melnick is caught bringing messages out of prison for one of her clients?"

Re: The Front Desk

[doesdoctorstuff]

"Yes!" the same nurse said excitedly. "They just had the reveal right before you came in!"

"Oh wow!" Navaan said, prodding at his side. "Take your shirt off so I can examine you better. You wanna go into a back room too?"

Re: The Front Desk

[single_man_tear]

“First of all, OW. No poking,” Dean said with a wince. “And should I be taking my shirt off out here in front of everyone?”

This seems like a HIPAA violation.

Re: The Front Desk

[doesdoctorstuff]

This whole island was a HIPAA violation, Dean.

"I did suggest going into the back room," Navaan pointed out.

There would be a squirrel there, too.

Re: The Front Desk

[single_man_tear]

Dean was momentarily distracted by the magical DOINK DOINK sound transition before shrugging. “Yeah fine let’s go there.”

The Exam Rooms

[doesdoctorstuff]

Where the TV isn't, so you'd better be even MORE convincing and/or hot if you wanted to get in there.

Re: The Exam Rooms

[single_man_tear]

HIPAA be damned.

“Have you done this before?”

I mean they had “played” doctor but…

Re: The Exam Rooms

[doesdoctorstuff]

"Oh yeah," Navaan said, pulling out her doctor bag, rooting around in it for awhile and coming up with...an acorn. "Perfect!"

Re: The Exam Rooms

[single_man_tear]

Dean just stared at her for a moment.

“Maybe I should do this myself.”

It wouldn’t be the first time.

Re: The Exam Rooms

[doesdoctorstuff]

"Don't be ridiculous," Navaan scoffed, pulling the acorn away from him. "You're not a doctor. Besides I'm about to do a very advanced medical technique." She looked down at the acorn. "What we're gonna do is pack the wound with dirt and put this acorn in there. And soon you'll grow a band of wooden armor able to stand up to ten times the number of stabbings your skin does!"

Re: The Exam Rooms

[single_man_tear]

To Navaan’s credit, Dean did consider this for about ten seconds.

Dean isn’t very bright.

“I’ve sewn myself up before. Maybe the nurse can bring a suture kit?”

Re: The Exam Rooms

[doesdoctorstuff]

"To keep the acorn and the dirt in?"

Re: The Exam Rooms

[single_man_tear]

“I’m not putting an acorn in me,” Dean said firmly. “Or dirt”

Re: The Exam Rooms

[doesdoctorstuff]

"You just don't understand medicine," Navaan argued. "I'm the doctor, you know."

Re: The Exam Rooms

[single_man_tear]

Time for a different tactic.

“Danielle Melnick gets naked with Jack at the end of the episode.”

Re: The Exam Rooms

[doesdoctorstuff]

"Wait, really?"

Re: The Exam Rooms

[single_man_tear]

“Then Mike and Claire join in and [community prohibited activity] then they [community prohibited activity] and I don’t why the monkey shows up but then they [Obscenity violation].”

Re: The Exam Rooms

[doesdoctorstuff]

"Finally!" Navaan said, darting out towards the main area.

For shame, Dean. Lying to a trusting woman like that.

Re: The Exam Rooms

[single_man_tear]

“That should buy me twenty minutes.”

Dean promptly locked the door to start stitching himself up.

The OOC

[doesdoctorstuff]

Re: The OOC

[single_man_tear]

Isn’t it “Doink! Doink!” Instead of Chung Chung?

Re: The OOC

[doesdoctorstuff]

It's meta'd omg

Re: The OOC

[throughaphase]

How dare you

Re: The OOC

[single_man_tear]

You mean dare to be right?